Soon I'll be able to literally start counting DOWN the days instead of watching the days I'm here increase (i.e. the title). Dr. Williams is supposed to give me a definite date and time tomorrow and I'm excited to be able to count down the hours until I meet Brooklyn and can sleep in my own bed again.
I went to bed last night feeling a bit clammy and "odd feeling" but didn't think a whole lot of it. This morning, I awoke feeling much as I did last night except that I now also felt nauseated. I thought breakfast might help but I honestly couldn't talk myself into ordering anything. I mentioned to my nurse how I was feeling and she brought me apple juice and graham crackers to see if they would help settle my stomach. They did a little but I was still feeling a tad crummy. After my NST, I ended up falling back to sleep and slept hard until 11am! I know that its not as if I have a lot to do but I have to admit that sleeping that late makes me feel guilty. The plus though was that I was feeling much better. I ordered lunch - a yummy PBJ - and was able to eat it all plus the plate of fruit I always order.
My afternoon was spent reading and knitting. Nothing too eventful. The highlight of my day was having Morgan and Paul show up for a few minutes to see me. Paul sat next to me on the bed and just held me in his arms. I have not been able to lean into his arms since Tuesday. It was so wonderful to be in my husband's arms. After they left, I showered and came out to a freshly made bed (I'm going to get spoiled). I didn't do so hot on my fluids today - only drinking 39 ounces total. I need to do better tomorrow since that is what is keeping my amniotic fluid up. Even though I slept quite a bit this morning, I feel exhausted tonight. It is only 7pm and I'm already to snuggle in for the night. I have my evening NST yet to do however so I will have to wait a while longer before I can do that. I'm excited to be more than halfway done with the week. Each week brings us that much closer to being able to go home.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Day 8
Can I just say how awesome it is to have been able to sleep without noise from the roommate's television or having to vie for use of the bathroom? LOL I slept WONDERFULLY!! I had my NST last night, showered and then crawled under the covers to get some sleep. I laid there for a while and prayed and thanked God for the blessings he's given me like a healthy baby girl who is still happily in her little cocoon, wonderful nurses that helped me to get another room and even a window! :) I turned on one of my Christian radio stations on Pandora and sang myself to sleep. LOL
This morning I woke up bright and early and ordered my breakfast. I seriously have not felt so refreshed in a week. I ate breakfast and then nestled in to watch some tv (lasted about 15 minutes... blech) and then decided to read some more of my book instead. I ended up falling back to sleep and napped until it was time to do my morning NST at 10am. Sarah called me and we chatted for a long while. At one point Dr. Williams came in and I talked to him about my fears of going natural when my water was already broken (meaning labor will probably be much longer than normal for me) and he was a great encouragement and answered all of my questions. He started to walk out to go deliver a baby and turned back around to tell me that I was handling this all very well and that he was actually very proud. It made me feel so good to hear that.
Tedra came by shortly after I ordered my lunch and we had a wonderful visit long into the afternoon. We got a good giggle when the window washers worked their way down to my room. It was so odd to see a guy dangling there from a rope, washing away. Tedra waved and he looked at her like she was in the psych unit. It was too funny. It was awesome to just chat with her and to find out that she was accepted into the first nursing school she'd applied to (and the best, in my uneducated opinion. LOL). Congratulations, Tedi! Shortly before Tedra left, my nurse came in and told me that she had good news - I was getting a roommate. Ok. No problem. Then she said that because I was getting a roommate and the roommate was a handful, they had a private room for me and I could switch as soon as they finished cleaning it. PRIVATE. How cool is that?! I packed up my belongings, placed them in a chair and sat back in bed to read until they transferred me. Let me just say how AWESOME my nurses are! They wheeled me to my new room, hauled all of my stuff for me and got me all settled in to a room that is larger than my own bedroom. And the view! Instead of the courtyard (picture "The Rear Window"), I have a wonderful view of the outside - I can see trees, the main parking lot, the street running along side the hospital. After not having a window and then having a view of the 7 floors of hospital across the courtyard from me, this is awesome. I feel that much less disconnected with the outside world!
I was able to get settled in and snuggle back into bed to listen to my music and read some more until Paul and Morgan surprised me with an early evening visit. Paul and I chatted for a while and then decided that I would take advantage of that wheel chair ride that Dr. Williams had granted me earlier in the week. I climbed into the chair, wrapped in a blanket and Paul wheeled me to the elevator and down to the first floor we went. From there, he took me outside to the courtyard that I had a view of from my previous room. I was outside for the first time since last Wednesday. I cannot tell you how wonderful it felt to be out there, even though I was surrounded on all sides by 7 floors of hospital and it was starting to rain, I honestly didn't care. It was so beautiful to me out there. I don't think I will ever take fresh air for granted again. From there Morgan and Paul wheeled me in to the cafeteria and I was able to enjoy a meal with my family - a first since Tuesday night. Then it was back up to my room for a couple rounds of Kings Corners with Morgan. I cannot tell you how wonderful it was to have them here and to have the privilege of going outside, even for a short time. I am seriously on cloud 9 right now! :)
Its currently 8:30pm and I'm waiting for the nurses to come in and say that L&D called and said they are ready for my evening NST. After that, its shower and bed for me. This past weekend was quite a challenge for me as I adjusted to the idea of being here for the duration of my pregnancy with Brooklyn (albeit only 3 1/2 weeks) but God has so greatly blessed my week so far. I know that there may be some "down" days in the next 3 weeks but I am so thankful for days like today that help seriously lift my spirit.
This morning I woke up bright and early and ordered my breakfast. I seriously have not felt so refreshed in a week. I ate breakfast and then nestled in to watch some tv (lasted about 15 minutes... blech) and then decided to read some more of my book instead. I ended up falling back to sleep and napped until it was time to do my morning NST at 10am. Sarah called me and we chatted for a long while. At one point Dr. Williams came in and I talked to him about my fears of going natural when my water was already broken (meaning labor will probably be much longer than normal for me) and he was a great encouragement and answered all of my questions. He started to walk out to go deliver a baby and turned back around to tell me that I was handling this all very well and that he was actually very proud. It made me feel so good to hear that.
Tedra came by shortly after I ordered my lunch and we had a wonderful visit long into the afternoon. We got a good giggle when the window washers worked their way down to my room. It was so odd to see a guy dangling there from a rope, washing away. Tedra waved and he looked at her like she was in the psych unit. It was too funny. It was awesome to just chat with her and to find out that she was accepted into the first nursing school she'd applied to (and the best, in my uneducated opinion. LOL). Congratulations, Tedi! Shortly before Tedra left, my nurse came in and told me that she had good news - I was getting a roommate. Ok. No problem. Then she said that because I was getting a roommate and the roommate was a handful, they had a private room for me and I could switch as soon as they finished cleaning it. PRIVATE. How cool is that?! I packed up my belongings, placed them in a chair and sat back in bed to read until they transferred me. Let me just say how AWESOME my nurses are! They wheeled me to my new room, hauled all of my stuff for me and got me all settled in to a room that is larger than my own bedroom. And the view! Instead of the courtyard (picture "The Rear Window"), I have a wonderful view of the outside - I can see trees, the main parking lot, the street running along side the hospital. After not having a window and then having a view of the 7 floors of hospital across the courtyard from me, this is awesome. I feel that much less disconnected with the outside world!
I was able to get settled in and snuggle back into bed to listen to my music and read some more until Paul and Morgan surprised me with an early evening visit. Paul and I chatted for a while and then decided that I would take advantage of that wheel chair ride that Dr. Williams had granted me earlier in the week. I climbed into the chair, wrapped in a blanket and Paul wheeled me to the elevator and down to the first floor we went. From there, he took me outside to the courtyard that I had a view of from my previous room. I was outside for the first time since last Wednesday. I cannot tell you how wonderful it felt to be out there, even though I was surrounded on all sides by 7 floors of hospital and it was starting to rain, I honestly didn't care. It was so beautiful to me out there. I don't think I will ever take fresh air for granted again. From there Morgan and Paul wheeled me in to the cafeteria and I was able to enjoy a meal with my family - a first since Tuesday night. Then it was back up to my room for a couple rounds of Kings Corners with Morgan. I cannot tell you how wonderful it was to have them here and to have the privilege of going outside, even for a short time. I am seriously on cloud 9 right now! :)
Its currently 8:30pm and I'm waiting for the nurses to come in and say that L&D called and said they are ready for my evening NST. After that, its shower and bed for me. This past weekend was quite a challenge for me as I adjusted to the idea of being here for the duration of my pregnancy with Brooklyn (albeit only 3 1/2 weeks) but God has so greatly blessed my week so far. I know that there may be some "down" days in the next 3 weeks but I am so thankful for days like today that help seriously lift my spirit.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Day 1-7
I have been on bedrest now for almost a month. It has been one week that I have been confined to a hospital bed at St. Johns. I had been contracting off and on, and bleeding, for the past 3 weeks and though Dr. Williams had me on bedrest, things didn't seem to slow much. On Wednesday night I was feeling uncomfortable but was elated that I had just gotten my maternity pictures taken care of earlier in the day (THANK YOU SO MUCH, MICHELLE). I have never had maternity pictures so this being our last, it was a wonderful treat. Paul and I climbed into bed to listen to the audio of The Shack. At about 9:30pm, Paul turned off the iPod and fell asleep. I was feeling uncomfortable so I laid next to him and played on solitaire on my phone. At about 11pm, I got up to use the bathroom, feeling "odd". Sorry, best way I can explain it.
After emptying my bladder, I noticed that I was leaking fluid still and was pretty sure it wasn't urine. Poor Paul was exhausted and though I stood at the doorway between the bathroom and bedroom and hollered to him, he didn't budge. I finally grabbed a baby rattle that was sitting on the dresser next to the door and chunked it at the bed. That did the trick and Paul, still quite groggy, popped up and asked what was wrong. What followed was chaos, as is always the case in the Blandford home. I checked and rechecked several times before I convinced myself that I wasn't just having major bladder issues. I got dressed and called the Rickards to see if they could watch Raegan. Then I called our neighbor, Michelle, to see if she'd watch the older two. While Paul tried to get things gathered up, my water really let loose and despite the pad that I had put on, my pants were soaked. I searched for the bag of JUMBO (mattress) pads that I had from my last stay at the hospital (you know, the ones that they give your right after you deliver) thinking that would surely do the trick.
We gave hugs and kisses to Morgan & Haidyn, thanked Michelle and were on our way. I contracted several times on the way to drop off Raegan but nothing too major. At this point, we were sure that Brooklyn would be making her appearance in the next few hours. Raegan was NOT happy about being dropped off which broke my heart. She'd already gone through so much in the past two weeks.
Once we arrived at the hospital, they got us into one of the L&D triage rooms and did all the preliminary things required when they admit any patient. On the way to the bathroom to give a urine sample, I soaked through that mattress and soaked yet another pair of pants. Blech! I was still contracting but was surprised at the lack of intensity compared to when my water was broken during labor with the girls. They hooked me up to the machines for monitoring Brooklyn's heart rate and my contractions. As always, Brooke's heart rate was perfect. I was still having contractions but they were pretty spread out - about every 6 to 8 minutes and lasting just over a minute. They swabbed the chuck I was laying on as protocol and the test was instantly positive for amniotic fluid. The on-call OB came in shortly thereafter to do an internal. I was between 2-3 centimeters dilated, 50% effaced and Brooklyn was sitting at a -2. Great if you're 37 weeks but not so much at 30 weeks.
They admitted me to Labor and Delivery and requested someone from NICU to come down and talk to us so we would know what to expect if Brooklyn arrived at 30 weeks. The plan for me was to be monitored, begin intravenous antibiotics and see if labor kicked in. If it did, then there wasn't anything more they could do to stop it as the two rounds of trebutaline and round after round of procardia had no affect. If not, they'd hold me until an undetermined amount of time (we got varying answers on the length of time). After a few hours the contractions slowed and eventually stopped. Thursday is a blur to me. I honestly do not remember much past more iv antibiotics and monitoring. At some point in the early hours of Thursday morning, someone from the NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) to talk to us and answer any questions that we had and take Paul on a tour of the unit. Slept a lot that day. Friday morning, Dr. Williams came in and told me they'd be transferring me from L&D to the floor so I wasn't having to be monitored 24/7. He said that the goal was to make it until 34 weeks when the risk of infection outweighs the risk of prematurity and then I'd be induced. So 4 weeks in the hospital. I wanted to cry.
I was transferred some time in the early afternoon on Friday to the room I'd become quite familiar with. I was excited to be off the monitors and in a more comfortable room but was a bit bummed to be in the bed closest to the door, rather than the window. Saturday proved challenging as I began to learn about the woman that was sharing a room with me. She was young and had a fiery personality. She liked to have the television up loudly all day and night and her fiance reeked of cigarettes. I asked my nurse if it were possible to get another room but her response gave me little hope. I resolved myself to being optimistic and prayed that God would give me compassion. God did give me compassion but the situation did not improve.
My wonderful friend Becky came up each night to keep me company until I was too tired to keep my eyes opened and then she'd leave and I'm curl up against my pillows and try to sleep. My roommate's fiance' and a few of their friends started coming over in the middle of the night and staying up through the early morning hours which made it difficult for me to sleep. I awoke Monday morning in a very foul mood from lack of sleep and complained to whomever would listen. By mid morning I was feeling a little better and felt guilty for complaining earlier. Still, I wondered if things would change. Twice a day I was put on the monitors and as always, Brooklyn would look great. The nurses continued to come in 4-6 hour intervals to give me another dose (or two) of antibiotics, this time oral instead of intravenously. Last night I was feeling just crummy overall. I missed Paul and the girls so much and each and every move Brooklyn made hurt because the fluid buffer between she and I has gotten low enough that there is little left. Each movement feels much like menstrual cramping. My roommate and her friends spent the entire night swearing, laughing and listening to a very loud television. It was so hard for me to get to sleep and so depressing for me. I did have two highlights to my night, however. My good friend Lora came and gave me a manicure and brought the cutest (and yummiest smelling) scented light. My nurses tell me that my room smells homey. :D And, Becky was able to come by for a couple of hours before having to leave to run errands.
This morning early (I think about 5:30), my nurse came in and woke me up for pills. The smell of body odor was strong and I had to hide my face under the blankets. My nurse leaned down and whispered to me and told me that they were going to move me. (the roommate was still awake with her friends; not sleeping at all last night.) A woman in the room next door was being discharged and I could move as early as this afternoon. I was excited. After the nurse left I got up to pee only to be beat to the bathroom by one of the roommate's male friends. This had happened so many times in the past 24 hours that I threw my hands up and just decided to try and get some more sleep. I awoke to an incredibly full bladder and again the awful BO smell. My nurse came in moments later to tell me they wanted to move me in the next 30 minutes. I got up, went to the bathroom and started to gather up my things. My roommate and her friends had finally crashed and were all snoring. I was thankful for this as I was afraid of the questions I would get if they realized I was moving out of the room. Not 15 minutes after the nurse came in to tell me 30 minutes, she was back again to bring me to the new room. I was excited! Not only did I get to change locations, I got the bed by the window! I can finally look out and see the sun (or the clouds as it seems lately). My room is nice, clean and doesn't smell like a men's locker room. And best of all, for the time being, I don't have a roommate. What a blessing.
Brandy and Becky visited me shortly after I got settled in and stayed for about 30 minutes. I read for a short while and then Michelle came up with a yummy peanut butter and jelly sandwich (something I'd been craving) and visited with me for a while. It was wonderful to have visitors during the day! Krista, Derrick with Haidyn and Raegan in-tow came by around 2:30pm and I was able to snuggle and "play" with Raegan for the first time since Wednesday. It did my heart so much good to see my baby girls. Alexa came about 30 minutes later and the group left a short time after that. Alexa's mother-in-law will be watching the younger girls through Friday to help out. What a blessing. After they left, I had a few hours to relax and catch up on my book. Paul and Morgan came in around 6pm for a visit and I hate to fight to not cry when they left. I am so very, very grateful for being able to see the girls and Paul today, as well as so many of my friends. It has been a wonderful break from what was starting to be a very drab routine.
Right now I am waiting for my last monitoring of the day so that I can shower and get some sleep. I am looking forward to the quiet rest that I will God-willing get tonight. There are days that 3 weeks does not seem that far off and other days, it feels like an eternity. I have to pray each day that God gives me the peace to make it through the day without getting depressed from being in this hospital bed while Paul tries to manage his responsibilities along with being Mr. Mom. I am so blessed to have such a wonderful and devoted husband. I feel very lonely for him at night but I'm so thankful for the time I was able to spend with him this evening.
Just 22 days left before our beautiful Brooklyn makes her way into our world.
After emptying my bladder, I noticed that I was leaking fluid still and was pretty sure it wasn't urine. Poor Paul was exhausted and though I stood at the doorway between the bathroom and bedroom and hollered to him, he didn't budge. I finally grabbed a baby rattle that was sitting on the dresser next to the door and chunked it at the bed. That did the trick and Paul, still quite groggy, popped up and asked what was wrong. What followed was chaos, as is always the case in the Blandford home. I checked and rechecked several times before I convinced myself that I wasn't just having major bladder issues. I got dressed and called the Rickards to see if they could watch Raegan. Then I called our neighbor, Michelle, to see if she'd watch the older two. While Paul tried to get things gathered up, my water really let loose and despite the pad that I had put on, my pants were soaked. I searched for the bag of JUMBO (mattress) pads that I had from my last stay at the hospital (you know, the ones that they give your right after you deliver) thinking that would surely do the trick.
We gave hugs and kisses to Morgan & Haidyn, thanked Michelle and were on our way. I contracted several times on the way to drop off Raegan but nothing too major. At this point, we were sure that Brooklyn would be making her appearance in the next few hours. Raegan was NOT happy about being dropped off which broke my heart. She'd already gone through so much in the past two weeks.
Once we arrived at the hospital, they got us into one of the L&D triage rooms and did all the preliminary things required when they admit any patient. On the way to the bathroom to give a urine sample, I soaked through that mattress and soaked yet another pair of pants. Blech! I was still contracting but was surprised at the lack of intensity compared to when my water was broken during labor with the girls. They hooked me up to the machines for monitoring Brooklyn's heart rate and my contractions. As always, Brooke's heart rate was perfect. I was still having contractions but they were pretty spread out - about every 6 to 8 minutes and lasting just over a minute. They swabbed the chuck I was laying on as protocol and the test was instantly positive for amniotic fluid. The on-call OB came in shortly thereafter to do an internal. I was between 2-3 centimeters dilated, 50% effaced and Brooklyn was sitting at a -2. Great if you're 37 weeks but not so much at 30 weeks.
They admitted me to Labor and Delivery and requested someone from NICU to come down and talk to us so we would know what to expect if Brooklyn arrived at 30 weeks. The plan for me was to be monitored, begin intravenous antibiotics and see if labor kicked in. If it did, then there wasn't anything more they could do to stop it as the two rounds of trebutaline and round after round of procardia had no affect. If not, they'd hold me until an undetermined amount of time (we got varying answers on the length of time). After a few hours the contractions slowed and eventually stopped. Thursday is a blur to me. I honestly do not remember much past more iv antibiotics and monitoring. At some point in the early hours of Thursday morning, someone from the NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) to talk to us and answer any questions that we had and take Paul on a tour of the unit. Slept a lot that day. Friday morning, Dr. Williams came in and told me they'd be transferring me from L&D to the floor so I wasn't having to be monitored 24/7. He said that the goal was to make it until 34 weeks when the risk of infection outweighs the risk of prematurity and then I'd be induced. So 4 weeks in the hospital. I wanted to cry.
I was transferred some time in the early afternoon on Friday to the room I'd become quite familiar with. I was excited to be off the monitors and in a more comfortable room but was a bit bummed to be in the bed closest to the door, rather than the window. Saturday proved challenging as I began to learn about the woman that was sharing a room with me. She was young and had a fiery personality. She liked to have the television up loudly all day and night and her fiance reeked of cigarettes. I asked my nurse if it were possible to get another room but her response gave me little hope. I resolved myself to being optimistic and prayed that God would give me compassion. God did give me compassion but the situation did not improve.
My wonderful friend Becky came up each night to keep me company until I was too tired to keep my eyes opened and then she'd leave and I'm curl up against my pillows and try to sleep. My roommate's fiance' and a few of their friends started coming over in the middle of the night and staying up through the early morning hours which made it difficult for me to sleep. I awoke Monday morning in a very foul mood from lack of sleep and complained to whomever would listen. By mid morning I was feeling a little better and felt guilty for complaining earlier. Still, I wondered if things would change. Twice a day I was put on the monitors and as always, Brooklyn would look great. The nurses continued to come in 4-6 hour intervals to give me another dose (or two) of antibiotics, this time oral instead of intravenously. Last night I was feeling just crummy overall. I missed Paul and the girls so much and each and every move Brooklyn made hurt because the fluid buffer between she and I has gotten low enough that there is little left. Each movement feels much like menstrual cramping. My roommate and her friends spent the entire night swearing, laughing and listening to a very loud television. It was so hard for me to get to sleep and so depressing for me. I did have two highlights to my night, however. My good friend Lora came and gave me a manicure and brought the cutest (and yummiest smelling) scented light. My nurses tell me that my room smells homey. :D And, Becky was able to come by for a couple of hours before having to leave to run errands.
This morning early (I think about 5:30), my nurse came in and woke me up for pills. The smell of body odor was strong and I had to hide my face under the blankets. My nurse leaned down and whispered to me and told me that they were going to move me. (the roommate was still awake with her friends; not sleeping at all last night.) A woman in the room next door was being discharged and I could move as early as this afternoon. I was excited. After the nurse left I got up to pee only to be beat to the bathroom by one of the roommate's male friends. This had happened so many times in the past 24 hours that I threw my hands up and just decided to try and get some more sleep. I awoke to an incredibly full bladder and again the awful BO smell. My nurse came in moments later to tell me they wanted to move me in the next 30 minutes. I got up, went to the bathroom and started to gather up my things. My roommate and her friends had finally crashed and were all snoring. I was thankful for this as I was afraid of the questions I would get if they realized I was moving out of the room. Not 15 minutes after the nurse came in to tell me 30 minutes, she was back again to bring me to the new room. I was excited! Not only did I get to change locations, I got the bed by the window! I can finally look out and see the sun (or the clouds as it seems lately). My room is nice, clean and doesn't smell like a men's locker room. And best of all, for the time being, I don't have a roommate. What a blessing.
Brandy and Becky visited me shortly after I got settled in and stayed for about 30 minutes. I read for a short while and then Michelle came up with a yummy peanut butter and jelly sandwich (something I'd been craving) and visited with me for a while. It was wonderful to have visitors during the day! Krista, Derrick with Haidyn and Raegan in-tow came by around 2:30pm and I was able to snuggle and "play" with Raegan for the first time since Wednesday. It did my heart so much good to see my baby girls. Alexa came about 30 minutes later and the group left a short time after that. Alexa's mother-in-law will be watching the younger girls through Friday to help out. What a blessing. After they left, I had a few hours to relax and catch up on my book. Paul and Morgan came in around 6pm for a visit and I hate to fight to not cry when they left. I am so very, very grateful for being able to see the girls and Paul today, as well as so many of my friends. It has been a wonderful break from what was starting to be a very drab routine.
Right now I am waiting for my last monitoring of the day so that I can shower and get some sleep. I am looking forward to the quiet rest that I will God-willing get tonight. There are days that 3 weeks does not seem that far off and other days, it feels like an eternity. I have to pray each day that God gives me the peace to make it through the day without getting depressed from being in this hospital bed while Paul tries to manage his responsibilities along with being Mr. Mom. I am so blessed to have such a wonderful and devoted husband. I feel very lonely for him at night but I'm so thankful for the time I was able to spend with him this evening.
Just 22 days left before our beautiful Brooklyn makes her way into our world.
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